Yuri Endo 2004
Over the past 10 years, my life has become particularly productive and pleasant due to the advance of technology. I write academic papers better and faster, speak with my loved ones spread all over the world more frequently and watch the most rare movies that I have longing for the longest time. Owing mostly to that, I thought I had become more resistant to loneliness. In fact, I do not cry as much as I used to. However since I started writing my last posts of the semester, I realized that I was partially wrong. Of course, our body water progressively decreases as we grow older is a fact, but that is not the only reasoning for the amount of tears we shed actually does not always go in hand with the quality of solitude we feel.
These past few days, I tried to literary lock myself in a dark room to reflect on myself and to test how long I could go without actual human contacts. First thing I attempted was to turn off my mobile and put myself in a situation that the internet and cable TV were the only connection with the outside world and myself.
By the evening of the first day, I was already feeling suffocated and went out to take a break. I even stopped by at a convenience store and had a good 5-minute conversation with a store lady. At this point, my attempt had been already failed.
On the second day, I felt completely isolated as unluckily (or luckily for the experiment's sake) no one I usually speak to on a daily bases came online. I corresponded to all my unreplied e-mail and even updated my social network site way more than usual. I searched for someone to talk to in vain, especially to let them notify that I voluntarily had whale meat once in my life, after watching another report on how the Japanese slaughter innocent mammals. Around 10 pm, I gave up and turned my mobile back on. Instantly someone called and we engaged in a-over-30- minute conversation. Considering my usual minute usage of phone, as much as the amount of time Ultraman can stay on Earth due to the air pollution, I must have been longing too much for human touch. I believe I don’t even have to mention the remaining days of my experiment besides a rough report on the average time I spent in front of my computer; more than 12 hours which was, to my surprise, less that I had expected.
In conclusion, despite my strong will and confidence in not leaving my room for a week, I did not last for even a day. However, I actually got to enjoy talking to random people on the street that talked to me, which happens to me a lot on a daily basis and I usually get extremely annoyed with those strangers. The experiment also made me realize that I haven’t gone to the movie theaters since March and how much I missed sitting on a fluffy theater chair and sharing popcorn with friends rather than watching download movies separately and discuss them online.
It’s definitely about time that I went outside and enjoyed mingling with human in flesh. Thank you and goodbye for now!
Over the past 10 years, my life has become particularly productive and pleasant due to the advance of technology. I write academic papers better and faster, speak with my loved ones spread all over the world more frequently and watch the most rare movies that I have longing for the longest time. Owing mostly to that, I thought I had become more resistant to loneliness. In fact, I do not cry as much as I used to. However since I started writing my last posts of the semester, I realized that I was partially wrong. Of course, our body water progressively decreases as we grow older is a fact, but that is not the only reasoning for the amount of tears we shed actually does not always go in hand with the quality of solitude we feel.
These past few days, I tried to literary lock myself in a dark room to reflect on myself and to test how long I could go without actual human contacts. First thing I attempted was to turn off my mobile and put myself in a situation that the internet and cable TV were the only connection with the outside world and myself.
By the evening of the first day, I was already feeling suffocated and went out to take a break. I even stopped by at a convenience store and had a good 5-minute conversation with a store lady. At this point, my attempt had been already failed.
On the second day, I felt completely isolated as unluckily (or luckily for the experiment's sake) no one I usually speak to on a daily bases came online. I corresponded to all my unreplied e-mail and even updated my social network site way more than usual. I searched for someone to talk to in vain, especially to let them notify that I voluntarily had whale meat once in my life, after watching another report on how the Japanese slaughter innocent mammals. Around 10 pm, I gave up and turned my mobile back on. Instantly someone called and we engaged in a-over-30- minute conversation. Considering my usual minute usage of phone, as much as the amount of time Ultraman can stay on Earth due to the air pollution, I must have been longing too much for human touch. I believe I don’t even have to mention the remaining days of my experiment besides a rough report on the average time I spent in front of my computer; more than 12 hours which was, to my surprise, less that I had expected.
In conclusion, despite my strong will and confidence in not leaving my room for a week, I did not last for even a day. However, I actually got to enjoy talking to random people on the street that talked to me, which happens to me a lot on a daily basis and I usually get extremely annoyed with those strangers. The experiment also made me realize that I haven’t gone to the movie theaters since March and how much I missed sitting on a fluffy theater chair and sharing popcorn with friends rather than watching download movies separately and discuss them online.
It’s definitely about time that I went outside and enjoyed mingling with human in flesh. Thank you and goodbye for now!
3 comments:
i miss watching movies with you Yuri!!!
Ultraman is AWESOME!!!
Hablando de soledad...
I can totally relate to your post. I hate being lonely, but ever since I moved to the States, I have been more lonely than ever. Last year when I got let go from my job, I realized I had no social life other than the people I liked at work. After I lost my job, I spent DAYS alone in my house, nobody to talk to, have coffee with or even go out to eat. Days became weeks and weeks became months... Home alone with my little chihuahua. I think we even developed a very effective way of communication.
Anyway, I cried so much and I missed all my dear friends so much, specially those friends you dont have to make an appointment weeks in advance so that they could talk to you for 30 mins...
I spent almost a year in the quietness of my home. I never went out. I realized that for better or worse, we need that human contact. Even from the people that you find most annoying.
After almost a year, I found a new job and my coworkers are AWESOME! However, I feel that I am talking them to death and I dont want them to think I am some kind of freak that spent a year isolated from humans. I realized I had wasted a whole year of my life that I would never get back...
Your life always inspires me. Even though we dont talk on daily basis, I am always so fascinated of the things you do, the places you live and the people you meet along the way. Gambatte Yuri chan!!!
Love you always,
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